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January 24, 2010

A Love Affair With Food

I titled one of my previous posts "I am having a rawnchy love affair with chocolate," but what I should have said, is I "am having a love affair with food!" Seriously. This is a huge transformation for me. I have always had an unhealthy relationship with food and struggled with cravings, never really feeling satisfied. My weight problem is not from eating too much, but from a combination of health issues and eating the wrong things. When I did let myself binge, I'd BINGE, fall into a spiral, and then make things worse by rationalizing, "Oh hell, I already screwed up, why stop here." Instead of having a few spoonfuls of ice cream, I'd eat the whole pint. I couldn't have it hanging around in my freezer, haunting me.

Since I have started this program, I have more energy, less mood swings, and  I feel elated. Here I am, home bound for the most part, still in quite a bit of pain...and I feel elated, excited and passionate about food.

We attended two social gatherings this weekend, and several people commented not only that they could see how passionate I am about food, but when they ate what I prepared, they could actually FEEL the love in the food. The funny thing is, I just commented to W last week that I feel so much love and enthusiasm in preparing these new foods and experience a lot of satisfaction watching others enjoy what I have prepared. I entertained a lot when I was younger, but I don't ever recall feeling this much exuberance about food. I am eating so much less, and feeling so much more satiated. The food is vibrant and alive...and sharing this with loved ones has given me a whole different way of looking at food preparation.  Eating raw is simple, and in this simplicity I am loving the colors, textures and flavor combinations of these beautiful living foods. It's amazing. I feel like a different person. Has anyone else had this experience? I would love to hear about it!

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